In answer to a special request from Anna over at Chocolate Keyboard, a reprint of an article from PiQ magazine, originally published in July 2008, and subsequently collected in the anthology Schoolgirl Milky Crisis.

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The girl who met me in reception had a badge that said Emma. She didn't actually tell me who she was, but sulkily informed me that she was here to take me upstairs. She didn't show an iota of enthusiasm until the elevator reached the designated floor, at which point she...