Now that I've managed to piggy-back off some silly hotel's free internet service, I have managed to catch up with the world.

Having finally figured out what swine flu is, I began looking for stories of tens of thousands of people suffering excruciating deaths. The thing is, all I could find was that maybe ten people have died from it, maybe a few more. More people die when the Newcastle Knights lose a home game! For those who are worried, let me suggest the following: given the fact that country