Finally took the plunge and went on Twitter. After several weeks of "tweeting" have a grand total of 14 followers, (lost 2) was "blocked" by a literary agent whom I insulted, (no need to thank me) and have a whole new appreciation for Facebook.

For those of you too smart to waste time with Diablo Cody tweeting about her chihuahua, or are simply not interested in an adult film star getting her butthole bleached, here are some highlights:

-- Louis Farrakhan taken aboard UFO. Can see future: Obama 1 term prez; USA destroyed by fire & brimstone; Jheri Curl popular again.

-- Govt survey spent 219k to find out if college girl more likely to have sex after drinking. Could've just slipped her a roofie.

-- New episode of Jersey Shore: Gang discovers fire & learns 2 use blunt instruments. Snookie attends T party; uses Glenn Beck's testicles as tanning goggles.

-- Watching movie. Steven Seagal so fat he's wearing Buddha around neck. Not medallion. Actual philosopher.

-- Pope thumbs down on condom use. Can't get an altar boy pregnant.

-- Joke: Whattaya call a bus load of YA novelists going off a cliff? A: A good start.

-- Did I Say "Elevator music for a narcoleptic" ??? Got title for next short story collection.

-- How 'bout Palin/Joe the Plumber in 2012? I'll swim to China with a liberal Democrat under each arm.

-- Joe the Plumber all for "conservatism" -- but can't pronounce it.

-- Sarah Palin: "Writing on hand poor man's teleprompter." Nah-uh Sarah. Just dumb white girl's.

-- New slogan: Toyota -- Ain't NO stoppin' us now!!!

-- That's no girl! That's me!! (Waving.)

-- Academy Awards: Was that Steve Martin or Mr. Magoo?

-- Sean Hannity sponsored by "Preparation H" -- can't make this stuff up.

-- Cameron loses best director; picture. Looking forward to next film project working with sock puppets.

-- Has Tom Hanks been smokin' Woody Harrelson's tux??

-- LI, NY woman pays 20k to have hubby rubbed-out. Gives hitman $500 deposit but insists on receipt for tax purposes.

-- "Horse Latitudes" outa stock blues continue. Amazon sez publisher to blame. Publisher sez Amazon. Right nut, left nut, dick in the middle (me).


Have a great weekend -- Quinn

www.twitter.com/@QuentinRBufogle