On Sunday afternoon, my wife sent me to Costco to "buy a mattress," with my brother Will. That is exactly what we did. We bought a mattress. Hours later, back at the house, she said, "Where's the box springs?" I, having not been told to purchase box springs, said, "What box springs?"

This discussion went round and round, finally settling on the decision that no adult in their early 30s could possibly believe that a bed could be complete without a box springs. Although I tried to tell my wife i...