So the other day

The witnesses came

And knocked upon my door

Both dressed in black suits

And they wanted

“Information”

They tried to come in

And they tried to hand me pamphlets

And they tried to make me confess

And they kept asking me this

“Have you found Jesus yet?”

So I told them

That I didn’t know anybody named Jesus

And that I didn’t know who he is or where he lives

And that I don’t know anyone named God

Or anybody named “Peter”  “Paul” or even

A Baptist supposedly named “John”

Let alone some woman named

“Mary”, the Pope or anyone else of

Any importance or of any significance

At all.

All I told them was that

I know this guy who lives

Down the block named “Noah”

Who is always in his backyard working

On his boat.

Both of them then looked at

Each other a little bit puzzled,

But they did not seem to believe

My story. And after saying something

About this guy that they were looking

For being quote “My savior” in an annoyed

And confused manner

Left.

So I closed the door and locked it

And then told Jesus that the coast

Was clear and that it was ok for him

To come out from behind my curtains.

“Whew!” That was close he said.

They almost got me that time!

I told him “Listen bro” Your secret’s safe with me.

Cross my heart.

Jesus scratched his beard

And made a peculiar face

“Very Funny” he said “Very Funny”

And with a wave of his hand

Made us some more wine