Support for Indie Authors discussion

moar like EFFbook amirite

yeah you gonna have to be waaaaay more clever than that bro

lets keep this professional

i kinda think that's the point of the discussion...

it does imply it in the title

My effin' woman bought me an effin' PS4 for Christmas.
First, you gave me the effin' gift too early.
Second, how the eff am I supposed to stay on target with writing?
And third, effin' thing won't be here for 2 more effin' days, and I have no patience!

B.B. wrote: "Charles wrote: "i kinda think that's the point of the discussion...

it does imply it in the title"

Really? I had no idea. Could you explain further?"

no time

Riley wrote: "My effin' woman bought me an effin' PS4 for Christmas.
First, you gave me the effin' gift too early.
Second, how the eff am I supposed to stay on target with writing?
And third, effin' thing won't ..."

4th it doesn't even triforce :(

i'm never going to get anything done if i don't stop wearing fuzzy pants

This effing thread is still going!

And my sales have flatlined.

And I just started a sentence with "And"

Eff you spiders! I let you live in my house and not only do you NOT eat the mosquitoes, but now there is a HUGE EFFING BLACK WIDOW ON MY PORCH HODING ME HOSTAGE!!!

no wai spiders are cool

Effin' Black Widows, damn things with their damned hourglass figures on their backs. Effin' things can just die. And did you know you eat an average of 8 of those effin' things a year? (Alright, that's a lie, but still, effin' eight legged freaks need to die!)
Never farther than 3 feet away from one of those things!

Bad News: Tomorrow's a holiday at my day job. So of course last night's when I come down with a chest cold.

Good News: Until I get better I can make a living doing Barry White impressions or as a movie trailer narrator (you know, the guy who says "IN A WORLD WHERE...").

A friggin' dog beat me up today. It was a rather hefty fellow that kept jumping on me and stepping on my feet. That punk!

F that entire bag of potato chips I ate out of depression because my sales rank dropped 100k spots in a week. My stomach hurts.

Melissa wrote: "A friggin' dog beat me up today. It was a rather hefty fellow that kept jumping on me and stepping on my feet. That punk!"

Some lady's large-breed poodle jumped on me and punched me in the gut with her giant, large-breed poodle paw. Took the wind outta me, and the lady only halfway apologized. Super lame.

Riley wrote: "Effin' Black Widows, damn things with their damned hourglass figures on their backs. Effin' things can just die. And did you know you eat an average of 8 of those effin' things a year? (Alright, th..."

A black widow wouldn't hurt a fly...

Dude...Just. Dude.

:D

Spiders are our friends.

Charles wrote: "A black widow wouldn't hurt a fly...
"

Maybe not, but it's been torturing a stinkbug three times its size for the last three hours. Not effing cool.

And that looks like a harmless wolf spider.

stinkbugs are the gd devil and it deserves every moment of torture it endures

In the summer I often find one or two large, muscular looking gray spiders hiding in the darkness of my storage shed. I don't know how dangerous they are, or even what they are, but I give them a lot of respect--and a lot of room.

ikr it's like people have never read Charlotte's Web wtf it's like the spider version of Old Yeller

I read Charlotte's Web when I was a kid and loved it. Then I read it to my younger brother and he loved it, too. It's one of the few books I remember from my childhood.

Spiders who will eat mosquitoes and not try to poison me have every right to live. However, as someone who has the potential of dying from what would only make most adult humans sick, I have the effing right to get effing mad at effing venomous a-holes lurking around my house!

There. I changed the title of this thread to make it more appropriate to the topic at hand.

Effin' people makin' effin' threads then hijacking their own threads and effin' going off about effin' spiders being the new puppies...

Odd, that video doesn't freak me out.

You know what's awesome? Banana spiders. Those are some pretty spiders.

Oh, angry thread, right...

People who don't like banana spiders make me mildly irritable!

MY SPIDER LOVE!!!! OOOH WEEEE OOOOOH WEEE OOOOOH!

i get mad when people demonize the noble spider

I mean just look at this beautiful jerk!

I get mad when spiders don't eat those bloody ants. I hate ants. Tiny, creepy-crawly little a-holes.

Quoleena wrote: "I get mad when spiders don't eat those bloody ants. I hate ants. Tiny, creepy-crawly little a-holes."

Ants and flies. We get so many dang flies in the summer. You'd think we'd get a crap ton of spiders eating them. Nope. Guess our flies aren't good enough.

A few years ago I took a closeup of a garden spider and it's now displayed on my website. Very colorful, and with garden spiders I've learned to live and let live--except when they build a web across my front door.

What do spiders and politicians have in common? They never get the job done. Yuk yuk

Okay, gonna have to get effin mad somewhere else it seems.

Effin' effin' thread not being about being effin' pissed! Can we all agree that birds at least need to die? Death to the remaining dinosaurs! With their pitiless eyes that stare into your soul.

Thanks Riley! Now I can get mad again in peace without getting the heebie-jeebies.

Where were the spiders? When the flies tried to break our baw-aw-aw-awls!!!

That's all Quoleena and Melissa's comments made me think of.

but spiders are the snugglebugs of the arachnids :(

Enjoy your stinkbugs!

I covered my weiners with pancakes. Can you spare some maple syrup?

Is that some kind of Maple Fever reference?

Maple fever is the best fever, eh?

Christina wrote: "Can you spare some maple syrup?"

OH!!!! That reminds me! I went to Hy-Vee the other day for maple syrup. They had the usual suspects, like Aunt Jamima or Log Cabin or whatever, but did they have any of the real stuff?

No!!! All they had was the effing fake stuff! The closest thing they had to real came from effing Wisconsin. Wisconsin for eff's sake! I wanted syrup, not cheese! Something from effing Vermont or effing Canada! What the eff is that thick brown shish? I want syrup not sugar sludge.

hy-vee sounds like some kind of std

Charles wrote: "KFC never gives me enough mashed potatoes to go with my gravy so F them."

Oh f# that!! Mashed potatoes in KFC? We in the UK don't even have that f'ing option. Now I'm mad about that!!! Gimme mash!!!!

yeah that almost sounds like a hate crime

ikr my glasses are like looking through a light drizzle half the time. they attract ever f'in speck of dust in the air. and don't even try taking a drink of that glass of fresh, fizzy soda even though you're dying of thirst

My effing pupils are dialated so I can't even see the screen with my glasses on, but my eyes strain with them off because I am blind as ish.

It would appear that some of you lot (and I'm not naming names) need to come to Boulder, CO for some of this action:


In the meantime, please refer to the above image for a cyber alternative.

Quoleena wrote: "It would appear that some of you lot (and I'm not naming names) need to come to Boulder, CO for some of this action:

"

But that's how cooties are spread!