Goodreads Authors/Readers discussion

Here is a small sample of a section of chapter 4 within my project. I want critical reviews and any words of advice.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B15U...

Excerpt:

As soon as I reloaded my weapon one of the attackers snuck up behind me and sliced the

back of my knee caps. (How does he know this? For all he knows, one of his team could have been a traitor and turned on him in the heat of battle. Tell me what he feels, for example: 'A quick, cold slice on the back of my leg left me on the ground.')

When I went down, the rest of my teammates were taken down, and the ruthless killers showed no mercy. I was held down by the attackers and they made me witness

the agonizing deaths of the rest of my team. (Don't just summarize it for me, I want to read a story: 'The blades sliced through the air and their heads, silencing those screams that will haunt me the rest of my days.)
P.S. I like this line - Their screams were sounds that I will never forget.

I am not trying to tell you how to write; you have your own voice and I believe you should scream it for the world to hear. I am merely providing you with examples.

Thank you for your comments. I will go right back to reconstructing the areas as needed.