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Writing Process & Programs > How do you fight self-doubts and inferiority complexes (especially as a beginner)?

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message 1: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments Hey guys,

Well, this is my entire question, really. I find them crippling. I keep going just because I enjoy the process too much, but at the same time, I feel I would be more active both in terms of writing and promotion if I was confident about my writing.
So, how do you know that what you're writing isn't completely stupid/dull/inconsequential etc.? I mean, yeah, I guess you can't be certain about such things, and it's all a matter of opinion, but still - how do you maintain your confidence?

Many thanks in advance!


message 2: by Ben (new)

Ben Cass (bencass) Your best bet, I think, is to find a critique partner. Somebody who will read through your stuff as you write it and give you constructive feedback and suggestions. The important thing is to find a partner you can develop a relationship with, get that confidence that they're not just saying things to be nice, and also not saying things just to be critical. When I finally made the decision to get serious and try to publish, back in January 2018, I found my first critique partner, and she fell in love with my writing and my story. I published the first book that July, and published the second book in the trilogy two months ago. Once the third book is ready, she will get it before my other critique partners do.

You could also look to see if there any local writing groups near you. We started one around here a few months back, and we meet twice a month. It's great to be able to get critiques and brainstorm live and in person, rather than just via online messages.


message 3: by Phillip (new)

Phillip Murrell | 427 comments Self doubt will always be there, at least a little. I remind myself that I love my work, so others will, too. I also watch a lot of movies/TV andc read plenty of books. This means I find stuff that's hated by the public and critics. I remind myself that these stories were made and experienced by thousands (sometimes millions), so there's always someone willing to take a chance.


message 4: by Brian (new)

Brian Keller | 13 comments There will always be self-doubts. Always. Accept that not everyone will enjoy or even feel interested in what you write, and that's ok. You're not writing for them.
The greatest challenge is in taking your material, whether fiction or not, and writing it in a compelling way. I cannot make any claims of success. I would say that with writing "I aspire toward mediocrity" and am satisfied to sell myself short, but I still have readers that are waiting for my next book.
For me, the most effective way to judge my writing is to critically edit my own work. I try to read it as if someone else wrote it. If I do that and find myself feeling jealous (aww, I wish *I'd* written that! That's good stuff!), then I know I've captured the material the way I intended. Then I hand it out to critics that I can trust to be honest (brutally, if needs be) and wait for feedback.
Thick skin isn't just a concept. It's almost a requirement for longevity. It helps to know that I've survived every critical word that's been spoken to, or about me.
Not sure how inspirational those words might be but I hope they help.


message 5: by Leah (new)

Leah Reise | 372 comments The same way you fight any kind, with self-positive talk. 🙃


message 6: by Dwayne, Head of Lettuce (new)

Dwayne Fry | 4443 comments Mod
Well, Leon, you suck. At least, there will likely be someone out there that thinks so. Maybe dozens. Hundreds! And there will likely be just as many (or more) who love your work.

There is one person you can strive to satisfy and that is yourself. It also helps to pass your book onto people who like more or less the same kind of books you like to write. They'll help you find problems you might miss on your own or encourage you in areas you might doubt.

If your passion for writing is strong enough and, especially, if you truly enjoy what you're writing, the self-doubt should melt away sooner or later.

Be warned of something that is likely going to happen in the future. You'll be writing along and maybe you get to your fourth or fifth book and for fun you go back and read over something you wrote three years ago and find it's not as good as you remembered. This doesn't mean you're a bad writer, it means you're growing.


message 7: by Dan (new)

Dan LaBash | 24 comments If we don't dare, then nothing new and unique is ever created! Keep at it!!!


message 8: by M.L. (new)

M.L. | 1129 comments It's like anything else, learn. Take classes, workshops, learn your craft. Write stories you like. Give and get feedback. Some will agree with you, some won't. You'll agree with some and not others.


message 9: by Eileen (last edited Aug 11, 2019 06:42AM) (new)

Eileen Iciek | 172 comments The best way to fight self-doubt is to get feedback from others. Writing classes, a writers' group, an editor's comments, putting your work out there for others to read and comment on. Some of what you write will be garbage, especially when you're starting out. No one gets better in a vacuum. You get better from the feedback, just like in school when a teacher corrects your spelling or math.

Even after doing all that, you will have people who won't like your work. Even the best writers have that problem, so don't take it personally.

Good luck!


message 10: by M.L. (last edited Aug 11, 2019 11:05AM) (new)

M.L. | 1129 comments I think it's the idea of being crippled by insecurity. It made me sad. Seriously. It's like sitting in front of the screen and becoming a deer in the headlights. It shouldn't be like that. It should be fun, that's what I think, not torture. If it is torture, I wouldn't do it. I write because it's fun and can't wait till the next story.


message 11: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments Hi everyone,

Thank you so very much, everyone who has contributed to this thread!
I think getting a writing/critique buddy is an excellent idea. I'm planning a new novel now and will most definitely get one of those once it's completed. Already joined a writing buddy community here on GR.

M.L. Yes, I know, right? I mean, I do do it for fun, I cannot not do it. I enjoy it immensely. And yet, there is sometimes this block in me that keeps whispering in my inner ear: "What nonsense! Turn this off and go read something by a proper author instead!"


message 12: by Brian (new)

Brian Keller | 13 comments What makes one "proper"? If everyone worried about that, we'd be interpreting cave paintings for entertainment.


message 13: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments Good question. I guess it's a bit like the definition of the word "text", everyone has their own idea. I guess someone who has proven their ability to write well and found their audience... But yes, I know, your question was rhetorical.


message 14: by B.A. (new)

B.A. A. Mealer | 975 comments Leon, the best advice I got was to sit down and write. Start at the beginning and go to the end. Don't worry about what it sounds like. It's going to be bad. That's what editing is for. My first book is still horrid, but I've had people who liked it. My second book was a lot better and the third one was better yet, and the one I'm editing now will be better yet. Yes, you do get better the more you learn, but...and this is something everyone has to understand, you need to be open to learning. Like other's have said, no everyone will like what you write and we authors are many times our own worst critics. So, get to writing, make it fun and let the characters do their thing and see where it all ends up. (I do plot mine out, but my characters are unruly characters and don't follow the plan..lol)


message 15: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments I totally agree, and that's what I usually do, too. Force myself to sit down and write. The first few sentences are often no fun at all, but then I lose myself in it.
I tell myself: go ahead and do it for five minutes. If, after that, you still feel uninspired and can't force yourself to continue, then don't. But when I've been writing for five minutes, I hardly ever stop.
Also, I think that maybe my problem is not my inferiority complexes when it comes to writing, but my inferiority complexes in general, whatever I do. But those have got better over the years.

Yep, I certainly know what it's like to have unruly characters. A while ago, when I was wasting time writing smut, I had two characters who, without any intention on my part, turned out so well-developed I felt terrible making them do all the dirty stuff I'd planned for them to do, haha


message 16: by Moronke (new)

Moronke (hotnicey) | 24 comments Don't be discouraged. Keep writing and publishing your work, You have your audience waiting to hear your story.


message 17: by Hanne (new)

Hanne Tonga (hannetonga) | 5 comments I think all writers have doubts about their book. To get over it use your friends as test readers, they will tell you if they like your book. But don't give it out before you yourself feel good about it


message 18: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments Well, that's the problem with having friends reading your work: they're your friends, and you can never be sure if they're just being nice or actually believe what they're saying. Even the literary consultant I hired seemed unwilling to be absolutely frank, judging by her tone. I mean, she did point out the positives and the negatives, but it really seemed like, in her final judgement, she was a bit too nice.


message 19: by Hanne (new)

Hanne Tonga (hannetonga) | 5 comments I have got the best critic from friends. They started by saying, we love your book but--- and then came the critic. I listened and corrected what I agreed on. I am sorry to hear that people don't seem honest to you but how do you yourself feel? I left my book for a while after having writing it, then I read it again and found things I changed. I think it is important to feel that you gave all you could


message 20: by Leon (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments It do the same. I leave the book for a while and return to it when I've gained a little distance. With my two novels, I also had beta readers.
The thing is, of course I do everything I possibly can to make sure they are as good as I can make them, and the moment I publish them, I really believe that they are pretty good, and fresh, and witty and what not. But then again, probably most of us do, right? As I mentioned before, it may be just my inferiority complexes, which I've had... well, most of my life, really. I think deep within I somehow know that I'll never be able to produce anything really great - but at the same time, I look at my novels and think: well, actually, they are pretty great. So, I have this horrrible contradiction inside me.

I'm doing a free Amazon promo this week until Sunday. Today is the first day, and I've already had over 1200 downloads, so hopefully, a few people will actually read the book and leave a review, and of course those people won't feel the need to be nice to me. But at least I'll know the truth. Well, not "truth", but you know what I mean. The general perception :)


Donald Standeford | 6 comments Go to a public place and jot in a notebook all you see, hear, smell, taste, etc. Keep that a couple of days, and then use these concrete notes to add your own narrative.


message 22: by Hanne (new)

Hanne Tonga (hannetonga) | 5 comments When You comment your writing is interesting so why should your books not be it? What is your book about?


message 23: by Jeremy (new)

Jeremy Jones | 13 comments Three words. Amanda McKittrick Ros.

She was an Irish romance writer that has the dubious honor of being considered the Worst Novelist in History. And she one of my writing heroes.

Imagine if you put a girl in a room with nothing but the trashiest, heaving bosom, bodice-busting, victorian romance novels to read. When she grows up, give that girl a pen and paper and told her to start writing. Some romance writers use purple prose, Ros' wax ultra-violet.

Yet when she was alive she was absolutely sure she was so sure of her talent that, despite reviews from literary giants like Mark Twain who said of one of her books, "one of the greatest unin­tentionally humorous novels of all time," she kept writing with a self-assurance that had to border on delusional.

So sometimes when the anxiety gets crippling and the imposter syndrome has me nearly paralyzed I'll pull up one of her novels (Irene Iddesleigh is available for free on Project Gutenburg) and instantly feel better. Because if someone can write those books with the confidence that legend has credited her with, it just kinda puts everything in perspective.


message 24: by B.A. (new)

B.A. A. Mealer | 975 comments The key is that you make the work the best you can within your abilities at the time. You will grow the more you write. Then you move on to the next project and repeat. There are many books out there that are wonderful in teaching writing. One of the major things you can do is practice. Write some short stories, practice scenes, and learn from your editors and what your fans want from you.

Like you, I feel that my writing isn't all that great when I read what others wrote. Then I find a popular book and think, I'm at good as they are, if not better. A several said, it's all about perception. I will read my reviews and learn from them. I don't expect everyone to like my books, so I expect to see some who hated the book. The thing is, if you enjoy writing, then keep plugging along and have fun with it.


message 25: by Stefanie (new)

Stefanie Stratton | 7 comments This thread speaks to me...lol I'm with you, Leon. I have those same feelings. I sat on my book for years and did nothing with it besides edit, edit, edit. I always thought, what if I did something besides just read it to myself or have a few friends read it. I took the plunge and made it a reality.

I've been through some intense things in the short time I've been on this planet, but for some reason, taking THIS plunge was one of the hardest things I did. Having work put out in the world is terrifying, but as scary as that feels, I finally saw something from start to finish and that feeling alone made me proud. I enjoy writing. Will any piece ever feel "perfect"? Nope. Will I win any awards? Doubtful. Will some readers hate it? Yes. Will some like it or dare I say love it? I like to think yes to both. But I don't write for all...I write for myself and I know after I put my all into something, there will be individuals who'll enjoy what I put out.

Keep doing what you love because above all, that's what matters the most. And if you love it, you'll find others that'll love it, too. In the meantime, I'll be your cheerleader and root for you!


message 26: by Felix (new)

Felix Schrodinger | 138 comments Watch Meryl Streep in the film Florence Foster Jenkins if you ever doubt your own abilities!


message 27: by Dwayne, Head of Lettuce (new)

Dwayne Fry | 4443 comments Mod
T.L. wrote: "If I may leave this here..."

No links and no self promotion. Thank you.


message 28: by Tomas, Wandering dreamer (new)

Tomas Grizzly | 765 comments Mod
I am a bit jealous you started this thread the day I went for my holiday, but...
Doubt is my constant companion. I doubted pretty much anything about myself before I started writing, and writing became just one more thing in which I doubt myself.
Practice makes this better - as I learn, the feeling is not as strong. Sometimes, I remind myself why I gave writing a try (to see a story that spent over a decade as nothing but a concept finished), how much I learned on the way, and the helpful people I've 'met'.

And, even if it ends up poorly, I can say I tried and gave it my best - which not everyone does.


message 29: by Leon (last edited Aug 17, 2019 06:19PM) (new)

Leon Kaminsky | 10 comments First of all, thank you so, so much, everyone who has contributed to this thread and given their encouragement. It does mean the world to me!

Re: Amanda McKittrick Ros and Florence Foster Jenkins... I often wonder if I'd like to be as oblivious to my own abilities as those ladies were. I honestly can't decide. I mean, I very much enjoy having deep roots in reality, but on the other hand, it was their complete lack of self-awareness that made them famous. Not that want to be famous... I mean, no, I guess I wouldn't mind, haha
Or, take Tommy Wiseau, the guy who made "The Room" (which I haven't seen, either - but I have seen "The Disaster Artist", which tells his story).
So, I guess, yes... ultimately, if I had this bizarre choice, I may well exchange my self-critical attitude against that sort of mentality. Mayby this sounds shallows, I don't know.

Donald Standeford, thanks for this brilliant advice. I actually followed your advice and went to a coffee shop yesterday! Will be certainly doing it again, not just for observing, but just because it seems easier to work there, and fewer distractions, in spite of the noise.

My confidence did suffer a bit of a blow this weekend though - my debut novel is free on Amazon until tomorrow night, and from over 2000 downloads, there really was someone who returned it. Returned a free copy! I'm just hoping it was because the person was disgusted or outraged - anything, just not bored.

Stefanie, will message you now!


message 30: by L.K. (new)

L.K. Chapman | 154 comments Leon wrote: "my debut novel is free on Amazon until tomorrow night, and from over 2000 downloads, there really was someone who returned it. Returned a free copy!"

I would guess the person who returned it bought it by accident. It's really easy to do, I bought an ebook by mistake just the other day and immediately returned it. I know your book was free anyway, but if they really didn't mean to buy it they may have preferred to return it.

Please don't let a returned book affect your confidence! It almost certainly has nothing to do with the book, and anyway, you'll never have any way of knowing why they did it so it's best not to dwell on it! It's great you had all those downloads, that's the thing to focus on :)


message 31: by Phillip (new)

Phillip Murrell | 427 comments Plus, be happy with 2000 downloads. That's a great number.


message 32: by Angela (new)

Angela Joseph | 132 comments Congratulations on your 2000 downloads. That should be enough to keep you going.


message 33: by Cece (new)

Cece Beyer (cecebeyer) | 2 comments ahh man - this really resonated with me. I think my answer is SLOWLY. I was terrified to show my work to ANYONE, and eventually I let someone read it, wow... then I told someone and then someone else..... the more I opened up, the easier it became. Don't get me wrong, I'm a LONG way from where I want to be... but Its getting easier, and it will get easier for you too. xx


message 34: by Tony (new)

Tony Blenman | 103 comments I think writing is like public speaking, there is always the initial feeling of anxiety and doubt, but it tends to become less of an issue with practice. My confidence grew with taking public speaking workshops, writing courses, joining a writing group, submitting pieces to an editor, reading my material out loud. There are other helps which you will find that fit for you.


message 35: by Kevin (new)

Kevin E. Eastman | 2 comments I keep this advice (the absolute BEST advice I've been given as a writer) in mind: “In the beginning, self-doubt is part of the process of becoming an author. However, remember this: no one can write your story better than YOU! There are BILLIONS of people in the world. Chances are, at least ONE of them has been looking for the message your story brings, but YOU are the only person who can write it the way you write! So… write it, and GET it to them!”

Hopefully, this helps you. It's keep me going through those rough periods of self-doubt.


message 36: by Phillip (new)

Phillip Murrell | 427 comments I believe writing your next story is the best cure. You'll see how much you've grown, plus it will remind you of your endless ideas. Eventually the audience will come. The more written before then means the bigger the reward when you're discovered. Despite how limited an audience it may be. I had one guy admit to me yesterday he read all five of my books in a few weeks and loved them all. It was an exceptional boost to my ego. I want to get book six to him immediately!


message 37: by Roxanna (new)

Roxanna López Kevin wrote: "I keep this advice (the absolute BEST advice I've been given as a writer) in mind: “In the beginning, self-doubt is part of the process of becoming an author. However, remember this: no one can wri..."

Great advice, thanks for sharing. I don't know if it helps him but it has definitely helped me just now.


message 38: by Anne (new)

Anne Schlea | 41 comments The more you write, the better you get.

I was at a discussion panel of writers a couple of weeks ago that discussed this subject. Many writers struggle with depression (or bi-polar as I do). The self-doubt kicks in and you think it's going to knock you over. Remember this: there's one person who needs to be happy with your art: YOU.

And also - ignore trolls. Those are the people out there who say mean things just to make you feel bad/them feel better/to start a fight. If you put your writing out there, you'll get them. They aren't worth your tears, time, or frustration.


message 39: by Chikodinaka (new)

Chikodinaka Echebiri (theodora19) | 9 comments I roll with whatever wip I am engaged in. I am welcome to suggestions and tips. But most of the time I read books by other authors and try to discern the pattern or flow of their stories irrespective of the genre. This way , I'm guided on how to adapt my storyline in a way that seems contextual and appealing. I don't beat myself up about any challenges that I am faced with. I love to learn and improve on my writing style. And it has been worthwhile.


message 40: by Roger (new)

Roger Bonner (rogeralanbonner) | 19 comments Hey Leon,
Relax. What's important is that you enjoy writing. That'll take you a long way.
As to inferiority complexes, remember, the market for written product is fragmented beyond belief. People like what they like, including a lot of stuff that makes me gag.
Run the numbers: let's say there are a hundred million adult readers in the US (an educated guess). If you impress one in a hundred - one percent - that's a million sales. If it's one in a thousand, that's a hundred thousand sales. Those are blockbusters!
So don't get too down when some poor misinformed reader fails to see the undeniable virtue in your latest work. But do try to improve, for whatever that might mean.


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