SCPL Online NonFiction Book Club discussion

Over the past several years, consumer DNA tests have become increasingly popular as people try to learn more about their ancestors, ethnicity, and family history. It's no spoiler for me to say that Dani Shapiro's life was turned upside down by completely unexpected results to the DNA test she submitted on a whim - the man she'd always thought was her father was not, in fact, her biological father.

Have you ever submitted your own DNA for this type of testing? If so, did anything surprise you about the results?

If you've never done this type of testing, have you considered it? Does this story make you reconsider whether or not you'd want to?

I haven’t done this kind of testing. I’m vaguely interested but I’m also pretty confident about where I came from. Unlike Dani I look exactly like both my parents so I doubt it would give me anything I don’t already know.

My cousins however, have done the tests. One found pretty much what he expected. The other (his brother) found his real dad. It’s always been a bit of an open family secret that A isn’t my uncle’s son (A’s mom had an affair which led to the end of their marriage). I’m not entirely sure if it was the DNA test that led to finding his birth father or his mother finally opening up. For A though it’s finally lifted the secrecy regarding his father and allowed him to develop a deep relationship with his other family. He’s still very, very much part of our family and still sees his “dad” (his mom’s first husband/brother’s father). He has also (like Dani) chosen to keep our family’s last name which he shares with his wife and daughter.

Hi Heidi!

I, too, look so much like my parents that I have no doubts about where I come from.

I think, if there is an "open family secret", at least it wouldn't be as shocking as it was for Dani. Though, I suppose her situation would also have been more shocking if she'd not been told her whole life that she looked nothing like her family. It sounds like, fortunately, this all worked out as well as it could for your cousin in terms of getting to meet his birth father and other family, but still keep close ties to the family who raised him.

Though I know who my parents are, certainly, I will also say that there has been a slight rumour/joke in my family about a possible affair and a family member who *may* have a different father than believed. I'm not sure how much weight there is to this particular rumour, but there is a part of me who'd love to find out with certainty through testing, even though it likely wouldn't actually change anything about our lives and family at this point.