Horror Aficionados discussion

has there been a precedence for this?

Mine doesn't either Tressa but after 24 years together he could probably care less about what I'm doing! I'm also rude on the phone when I'm busy trying to work and hate to be bugged. He knows that and leaves me alone. It works both ways though. I never call him either, unless I have to.

No, she's always been that way but because I am having some health issues recently the fear has increased.

My husband, like so many others here, does not like to chit chat on the phone. Sometimes he does, and it always takes me by surprise; I keep asking him what he wants, thinking he has to have an ulterior motive. I knew he loved me when we dated because we talked every single night for a year and then got married.

Wow, did you have anything to talk about after that?

Of course. Talk about. Yell about. Pout about. Lots of talking going on at our house.

i don't mind talking on the phone, sometimes it is the best way to stay connected with friends with a lot of work/family responsibilities, or with family who don't live near me. can be chitchat or it can be fairly deep. i can talk for hours! although, in my case, it is usually listening. sometimes i feel like a professional listener.

i mentioned before that i'm not shy, but i am shy in one case: i cannot abide going to bars or events or big parties on my own. i hate that awkward feeling of being the first person i know who's arrived, and just waiting there for someone else to show up, standing around looking hopefully at the door. ugh. just makes me feel awkward.

i'm a pretty social person, but overall i tend to prefer to be on my own, so i can only take being social up to a point...and then i take off. things will be going swimmingly but after a couple hours, i guess i just get tired of people. i used to have a problem in sneaking off and not telling anyone so that i couldn't be convinced to stay longer, but folks eventually caught on and it became a big joke, and now i have to make sure to do my goodbye rounds. i go on frequent trips with friends and i always have to build in some alone-time, or at least have my own room to retire to. i also hate being sloppy drunk and am aggravated by sloppy drunk people, so if it looks like things are going that direction, i'm outta there. fortunately, this happens less and less as me and my friends get older and older.

I'm not a big fan of talking on the phone, either. I was when I was younger. Now I just find it annoying.

*primal scream!* I have been notified of this "updated" thread ten times already! I love ya, Jason, but I don't wanna see your face at the end of page 5 again. Got that?!

Gatorman wrote: "She thinks something bad may have happened to me if I don't respond."

Oh, sweet. Not nagging but worried about you.

Nah, it doesn't matter to me. If they love horror movies or horror books and have the same interests as me it doesn't matter, I love recommendations I wouldn't get otherwise.

I used to just accept any friend requests but after only two years on GR my friend list sky-rocketed to the dizzying heights of nine friends. Since then I’ve added a question to deter the weirdo’s and promoters. I just use the standard “How do you know me?” question, but I’ve been thinking of changing it to “Would you mind if I cooked and ate you?”

I am currently taking notes, collecting personal data and I’m going to send friend requests to everyone in this thread.

Phil, how come you only have 20 friends? And what is up with that Rick guy and his 5,000 friends? Hey, you've got two crazy followers. I remember that deleted guy from the Goodflicks group.

Make that 4,999 friends now! I swear I've never seen that Deleted Member before in my life, why was he following me :S

I only accept friend requests if I sort of, kinda half know the person through a group like HA or something; and I almost never send out friend requests.

LOL. Wonder if Rick will notice you're no longer on his list?

Don't be paranoid about the following thing. I know that it's easy to forget to uncheck the box for following someone when you accept their friend invitation. I've forgotten to do that before and will have to go back and uncheck it.

I only follow authors. It's another creepy thing IMO (get this, in MY opinion) to follow people on here. If you're friends with someone, whatever they do is going to show up in your update feed, if they want you to see it, that is. I mean, I enjoy my friends' reviews, but they're not my favorite authors.

Well I had to edit my list just now, cut out a few people. Some I haven't seen here in almost a year & a couple a realized I wouldn't consider a friend for anything. Oye!

I only have 6 friends.
When I friended them I said that I was looking for Good Reads friends & they accepted.

Poor Rick. He always gets crap for his friend list.

I thought 85 friends was low. I guess 6 and 20 have me beat.

I am proud to be on Phil's short list of GR friends. He has excellent taste. :-)

There are two guys here named Tani and Rob who have hundreds of friends...and they're all women.

And the problem is...?

Oh,hush or I'll sign you up at Trixie's porn site.

I just cut a lot of people....that Rick guy asked me to be a friend too along with his group. I looked it over a bit, but was not interested so I deleted him along with the MANY other authors in the group who kept sending me requests.

I have a question now, but I don't think it works.

I used to be painfully shy, but now I am just socially unacceptable. I do not liking hugging or shaking hands and please stay out of my personal bubble when standing in line. The whole eating out experience is no fun either....the staff is either too friendly and wants to sit at the table (which I hate when they do that) or feels the need to joke around. I am here to eat with the person I came with NOT play nice with the waiter.

There is a local restaurant here where the owner will actually sit at your table for 20 minutes to shoot the shit. I will never go there for that reason. I don't like talking to strangers, it makes me anxious and I really don't want to be doing it when I'm paying for dinner!

I don't mind if a local restaurant owner walks by my table and greets me, but I would not appreciate anyone pulling up a chair uninvited to disturb my dinner conversation with the people I chose to dine with.

The owner of the restaurant where my wife and I had our wedding reception (and which she uses as a caterer for many work functions) will often sit down with us during our dinner for 5-10 minutes to talk about stuff. We don't mind because we have known him for a while, but I can see how it could be an issue if the owner is a stranger.

I've never had one sit down at the table...that's weird! I think it's nice if the owner comes by to see how everything is though. It shows they really care about the food.

jennbunny wrote: "I just cut a lot of people....that Rick guy asked me to be a friend too along with his group. I looked it over a bit, but was not interested so I deleted him along with the MANY other authors in t..."

I'm with you. I hate all this touchy-feely in our current culture. If my tag is sticking out, leave it--don't touch me to stick the tag back in. Don't sling your arm around me at work. And don't get me started with hand-shaking . . . ;} You're not alone.

And while your at it, don't call me "hun" and touch my lower back when you're behind me as I'm walking away from a conversation. It's creepy but something that a lot of older "gentlemen" seem to think is ok. Next time it happens I may have to slug someone. I would never touch someone that wasn't in my immediate family.

Oh, my God. Do not mention handshaking when Scott is hovering up yonder. ^^^

I would NEVER touch a stranger. Hell, I don't even touch people I've worked with for decades. It's just too personal. However, I don't really mind if someone I know touches my shoulder or lightly taps the back of my hand to get my attention. I don't like anyone to put his/her arm around me, though.

Oh, and I do not mind little terms of endearment like "hon" and "dear" and "sweetie."

Scott wrote: "I've never had one sit down at the table...that's weird! I think it's nice if the owner comes by to see how everything is though. It shows they really care about the food."

It is weird and makes me feel uncomfortable. Most people seem to love it though and the place has been in business for ages. They think the owner is a "character" and go there just to hear what outrageous thing she'll say. She just scares me.

Sometimes there's nothing more annoying than a local "character."

I don't mind being called hun or dear it's kind of endearing sometimes but when the "hun" is accompanied by a touch it freaks me out. Maybe I should seek counselling before I become the crazy cat lady.

You can't become a crazy cat lady if you're married with kids and love dogs.

Touching on the small of the back...always a no-no.

Have you ever noticed that when men do hug you, their hands will somehow find their way to the back of your bra? Weird.

Tressa wrote: "You can't become a crazy cat lady if you're married with kids and love dogs"

Good, I don't have the money for counselling anyway. Yes, they always go for the bra. I think it's one of those instinctual things they just can't help. Similar to a dogs need to dig or lick their balls.

Tressa wrote: "You can't become a crazy cat lady if you're married with kids and love dogs.

Touching on the small of the back...always a no-no.

Have you ever noticed that when men do hug you, their hands will s..."

Then your hugging the wrong men. I never do that. My hand finds a safe place.

I guess the best thing for men to do when they hug people they don't know well is to keep their arms hung limp at their sides.

that's a very awkward hug.

Works for me! I know a guy who nearly squeezes the life out of me every time I see him with his boisterous hugging. He's a friend so I don't speak up but one of these days I swear he's going to crack one of my ribs.

Michael wrote: "that's a very awkward hug."

Oh, it doesn't work, huh?

BarkLessWagMore wrote: "Works for me! I know a guy who nearly squeezes the life out of me every time I see him with his boisterous hugging. He's a friend so I don't speak up but one of these days I swear he's going to c..."

No one's ever this glad to see me. :-(

sad to say, i think i may be one of those people you all resent. i just don't have that personal space bubble that so many folks who've commented really seem to want. ah well. to me, that need that some folks have to never have that kind of casual, physical connection is as odd to me as my behavior probably is to them. i don't even think about it, i do it automatically. i've never really noticed anyone recoil but perhaps i am oblivious. i grew up in a fairly 'physical' family and most of the friends in my life are that way too (many of them are close-talkers as well, which i know drives some folks up the wall)...so i suppose i just never really give it a second thought.

sorry to any of you who may have the misfortune to meet me...you will probably be touched or handled in some way! LOL. my regrets, in advance.

In my family we rarely hugged; nice you grew up in such a demonstrative family, mark. Not everyone makes me recoil when they get close to me or gives me a hug. Not friendly, funny space invaders such as you, mark. :-D

aw, thanks tressa!

Just don't go for the bra strap or the lower back or I might have to slug you ;) My family weren't big huggers either, maybe that's why I have an aversion to strangers touching me. My husband's family is the complete opposite. He even has a cousin who will casually kiss you on the lips!

I don't mind hugging people hello or goodbye, but I don't like when it's always expected every time someone arrives or leaves. I mean, at a wedding, funeral, Christmas morning, OK, but leaving a restaurant or ball field? No. Save it for special occasions.

But my husband and I hug a lot and we hug our son a lot and we all say "I love you" as often as we can. We rarely said that growing up, even though we all did love each other.

Mark, my pleasure. :-D

I'm not a hugger or even a hand shaker, unless I absolutely have to. Those who receive a hug from me know they are special or it is a special occasion :)
I'm comfortable hugging my SO and do so often, but that's entirely different, of course.

i'm demonstrative, but i get freaked out a little bit by kisses. it just seems so personal! i grew up with lots of hugs & kisses (corny, i know), but when someone i barely know or who is only a professional colleague leans in for a kiss on the cheek (or - egads - on the mouth), it is a little off-putting. i guess my kind of 'demonstrative' is less oral and more manual, so to speak. a squeeze of the shoulder. a light slap on the back. a hug if it seems appropriate. definitely hand-shaking, and different kinds of those depending on the person. and the like.

my close friends and i do a bit of arms-around-shoulders, shoulder massages, and especially some playful punching or arm-socking, etc, but then these are guys i've practically grown up with.

As much as I don't like being touched, I always make exception for shoulder massages...some things are just worth it :)

Mark it sounds like you have a great family an friends. Everything was strained in my family and I never had many friends and no real close friends.

I have a small germ problem. I know it seems unreasonable and I only have it mostly with people not with animals.

Another issue with the food service industry is the germs especially teens in fast food places.

What really gets on my nerves are the old people who hit you with their carts.