Dave Barry's Blog, page 16

I had the worst diarrhea ever on a plane ��� they had to land and cancel the flight

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

For some reason this person felt the need to announce this on social media.

Indiana man's sunflower surpasses record at 30 feet, 7 inches

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Firefighters free woman stuck inside Chuck E. Cheese game in Burbank

(Thanks to man tom)

It hasn���t had sex in 80 million years

(Thanks to Ralph)

Cockatoos have at least 30 distinct dance moves, Australian researchers find

(Thanks to Rodney Bertlesen)

...is this?

(Thanks to pharmaross)

One of the more bizarre findings came from Hilton���s phone, which police say contained videos showing her parrot, named "Mango," repeating "two for 25," a suspected drug deal reference.

(Thanks to pharmaross, who asks if they will give the parrot a "polly-graph.")

Please just stop.

UMPIRES USED TO FART ON ME 'But I Returned The Favor'

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Smoothie King, Heinz collaborate to launch 'first-ever' ketchup smoothie

(Thanks to Jim Perth, Ron Wylie, MOTW and EricY)

Hard to believe nobody thought of it sooner.