S.M. Bjarnson's Blog

Hello, Everybody!

I have been misguided you could say, or distracted from the passion and lifestyle of writing. I wonder if many of you have felt this way as well. I am back at it again and currently working on books 4, 5, and unknown 6.

I am also excited to say that I am a Vice Publisher/Writer with the Double Decker Books E-Magazine online now!

More will be added! And This time I will not fail you.

I've been gone for quite sometime, from the writing world that is.
It was not that my heart had no words to speak, but that my soul hushed the urges to express their poetic tones.

That is the thing with success, it is on many different degrees, and varies from one person to the next. Frustration grows, and you question your creative talent, now a year or so after, I have come back, not wanting to let my words go, not wanting those dreams to die. Because, inside there is more to speak, more to write, more to read, more to be. Yes, I find my days even hesitating the very notes I transcribe. If no one reads my words, will the success still remain the same, if no one remembers my name?

When I initially started to write young adult books, my goal was to just help one person, and it would be worth it. The goal expanded to walking into a book store and seeing my titled manuscript on their shelf. I have had this dream for sometime, and as a self-published author it is the very best you could ever dream. Having a literary agent also is another one that proves more power than I would like to give it. Your work is based on the belief of others in you, and how the market might accept your tones. Not necessarily in that order.

We live in a world of making a dollar, even if the dollar is crap and can't control it's liquor.
When the penniless poet reaches for an audience, there are no ears to be heard. The deaf community only applauding in the stance of appearance.

So here I stand 3 self-published titles under a name I have been blessed with and married into. Do i continue to write a 4th and a 5th, all the way up to the 9th? Am I supposed to deliver my words to all ears everywhere, and to all eyes of the readers I am supposed to reach?

My question remains the same, as I struggle with the frustration of what success really means to me.

It is sadness that makes us grow, makes us conform, makes us settle then less than we deserve. We are writers yes, professors of love and knowledge, sure, but the consequence of being, has led us into thinking we are great and people should believe in our souls as much as we believe in our typed paragraphs.

Not that we are not wonderful and intelligent, but we have to choose to become more, to suffer greater for the success of our names and the titles we hope to gain.


It is all in the name of art and becoming an artist.

The choice is always yours, believe in the dream or not, and the fate of the outcome will be its truth.

S.M. Bjarnson
www.holisticalleviation.com

Links to Author S.M. BjarnsonAuthor Central: amazon.com/author/smbjarnsonGoodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show... www.linkedin.com/pub/s-m-bjarnson/95/... @smbjarnsonBlog: www.sbjarnson.blogspot.comInstagram: @holisticalleviation
Links to The Tangled TearsAmazon:http://www.amazon.com/The-Tangled-Tea...https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22014734-the-tangled-tears?from_search=true

Links to The Circus in MeAmazon: http://www.amazon.com/The-Circus-In-S... https://www.createspace.com/4181667Go... https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2...

Links to The Sacrificing MotherAmazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1492800449Cr... https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2...

Check out @doubled_books's Tweet: https://twitter.com/doubled_books/sta...

A lot of things in life are directed at us as tasks and immoral gestures. There are very simple ideas of where we are left when regarding such transparencies. It is true, I have held back on commenting but for reasons I am ashamed to say. Doubt has gotten a hold of me and here I hope to relinquish the chains that bind me to such an awful passenger. I am starting a new journey and wanted to share it. I will be going to school to get receive my Holistic Wellness Practitioner diploma. Yes, it seems like a new world job title, but i assure you i am more interested in helping individuals, just as I hoped i would through this dream of writing. So I will still keep this blog because I don't think I could ever give up on my writing spirit or my imaginative soul. I am going to start a new blog focusing on my new found aspect. Let your heart desires be known and always stay true to who you truly are, no matter who doubts or believes in you, make sure that you are always the first person to praise and liberate yourself. Sincerely,S.M. Bjarnson  (Google Images Search)

Poetry is… by, Jeniann Bowers
Jeniann professes a delicate, but strong courageous voice through her pages of poetry. She engulfs you in a feeling of peace and comfort as each syllable is read and repeated. Her words and phrases catch you as an individual who understands and proclaims victory upon impossible life consequences. The truth is laid out in front of you, bleeding dry the thought of reality. For when you dive in and read such acclaiming words, you become lost in yourself. S.M. Bjarnson



Playlist for “Poetry Is...???”
1.      Bad Company – If You Need Somebody2.      Bon Jovi – Born to Be My Baby3.      Bon Jovi – Have a Nice Day4.      Bon Jovi – It's My Life5.      Bon Jovi - Livin' On A Prayer6.      Def Leppard – Have You Ever Needed Someone So Bad7.      Def Leppard – When Love & Hate Collide8.      Def Leppard – Miss You In A Heartbeat9.      Def Leppard – Love Bites10.   Def Leppard - Hysteria11.  Cheap Trick – The Flame12.  Journey – Faithfully13.   Journey – Separate Ways14.   Journey – Open Arms15.   Kiss – Forever16.  Motley Crue – Without You17.  Poison – Fallen Angel18.  Poison - Cry Tough19.  REO Speedwagon – Can't Fight This Feeling20.  April Wine – Rock Myself to Sleep21.   Foreigner - I Want to Know What Love Is22.  ZZ Top – Rough Boy23.   Mr. Mister -  Broken Wings -24.  Godsmack – Voodoo



Place Videos for:Def Leppard – Have Your Ever Needed Someone So Bad  – “Why You”Def Leppard – Miss You In A Heartbeat - “My Love For You”April Wine – Rock Myself to Sleep  –“May Not Have You”



“Why These Songs & Poems”
Def Leppard – When Love & Hate Collide “Why You”        As a poet who lives and breathes from feelings and emotions around me, I am deeply passionate about what a song says when I listen to it. And, I listen to a lot of music! And most would laugh if they knew how much I loved the rock scene of the 70's & 80's and the ones that continued on past the grunge area.. But these artists of this time period along with great poets is why I write.        Such as Def Leppard, a huge fan and a lover of their lyrics. This song, even though released in 1996 and was a new released song on their album Vault, it is still one of my favorites and it inspired the poem “Why You.”           The poem, “Why You” was written from the point of when a friendship may lead to something a little more serious and only one wants it. Most of us has encountered this at one time or another with a close friend who we start having feelings for and wanting more from the relationship. But then those awful words are said “Friendship Only” but you feel it to be lie or a cover up of fear because the other person has shown that they feel the same.         I wrote this because I know exactly how it feels, your mind starts to play games and dreams interfere with your concentration during the day and you know that when that special someone said those words “Friendship Only” that is, when love and hate collide. “When Love & Hate Collide,” plays on my phone, I cannot but relate to how love and hate collides in our everyday relationships and how love has to be stronger than hate or hate wins and the love looses and then we find ourselves lost and broken.
Def Leppard – Have Your Ever Needed Someone So Bad  – “The Disease”       Again, being a huge fan and a lover of Def Leppard's lyrics. This song, even though released in 1992 and a classic song by on their album Def Leppard – Miss You In A Heartbeat - “My Love For You”       Yes, Def Leppard rules my phone a little too much! This song was released in 1992 and a classic song on their album Retro Active, it is still one of my favorites and it inspired the poem “My Love For You.”      And, yes, another love poem and wishing, wanting, hoping and never having the love. But love does not always mean that you have to be together in a full relationship to love someone forever. I have loved and still love many people that have come and gone from my life through the years. However, sometimes we go to our grave before we really hear someone confess their love for us.
The next three poems and songs I hold very close to my heart. Here is why, when I was young, wild, crazy teenage girl, my first love committed suicide when he was only 16. These next three songs and poems stem from that time period when we thought nothing bad would ever tear us apart and we loved to hard.
April Wine – Rock Myself to Sleep  –“May Not Have You”      This song was the song he played all night on our first date. I still get the shivers when I think about him, that night and listen to this song. For many years after his death, I did just what this song title says, I rocked myself to sleep by listening to all of our favorite songs. And even after I was married I found myself at times hidden away from everyone listening and crying over the loss of him.         The poem “ May Not Have You” was inspired from our relationship. We dated off and on for two years and then on tragic night it happened and after that I never felt completely whole ever again. And even though it has been 28 years since then, every now and then he pops in and out of my dreams and I wake up feeling young all over again.
Foreigner - I Want to Know What Love Is  - “Unknown to Me”      This song was the last song we ever listened to before he died. We had spent the day together hanging out, talking, laughing and even some tears fell that day...ten days later he was gone. When I think back to those days and him, I know he was my soul mate and that we were meant for each other. We had so much in common and our families were had a crazy story behind it too. Just so you know his dad was my mother's first love as well.       But the poem, “Unknown to Me” is about finding your soul mate in life. Back then we were young, wild and crazy and didn't know this. But as I live my life now, I live for him as well. Even if I find love again which I know I will, he will still be apart of me me because it was all unknown to us and especially me that I would be living life for both of us, while he watches over me from heaven.
Mr. Mister – Broken Wings - “Morning Glory”       This song has no real connection to him, it was a song I would play over and over again after he died. I would lock myself away and listen to it in my room for hours, because I felt that this song had a message to me from him. And, that message was, him telling me that we both had broken wings but we had to learn how to fly again. He did when he received his wings and I am still here trying to learn how to fly and free from the pain, and hurt I have had to go through in life from so much loss and hatred.         The poem, “Morning Glory” was a poem I wrote to him, when I finally felt like I could say my goodbyes and but I will continue to cherish him in my heart and dreams. “Morning Glory” is my way of closing a chapter of my life that took 28 years to do, but one I know I can reopen with love at anytime and know he is here with me.
The next two songs and poems have to do with my life and my dreams of rebuilding who I am today.Bon Jovi – Have A Nice Day - “Struggles”       Besides being a huge Def Leppard fan, I am a huge fan of Bon Jovi. And life gets me down and out at times and I just have to back up and play this song and move forward. My life, just like everyone else, is not easy. My kids, music and writing is what keeps me going. Take that away and I would seriously have to hurt someone..lol! I live a life of chronic physical pain, anxiety and  neuropathy and being a single mom who struggles to just make ends meet with no help from anyone can make life overwhelming, stressful and tough. The poem, “Struggles” is about my daily life and how hard it is sometimes to make it through the day and into the night.  And when life hits me hard, I play this song, smile say “Have A Nice Day” and Kiss My A** to the world around me and dive into writing, my kids and my music.
Poison – Cry Tough - “inkstand”   This song, “Cry Tough” has always been a awesome song and one that I always held close when I felt things were fallen apart. A year ago, I threw my hands up and walked away from every dream I ever had. I allowed myself to fall into a deep dark depression and loneliness. Then, two months ago after friends and my kids convinced me into coming back to writing and publishing, I started to listen to this song again for inspirational purpose and because I loved and still love Poison.  Sometimes we do have to fight harder than others have to for our dreams to come true and make things work so they can become a reality instead of a dream up there in the stars hanging over us waiting for us to catch them. My dream is just to write  great poems and work hard to help others achieve theirs.



 Poetry Is...??? Blog Tour Dates: January 15th - January 31st

Poet's Bio
Jeniann is the owner at Poetry is...which is a blogging business of her own personal poetry and also a blog to help spread the word of poetry and teach the world that poetry is an excellent choice to write and read. Jeniann is a firm advocate for poetry publishing and writing poetry.
Jeniann is also a five time self-published poetess. Her books have been in the top ten best selling list on Amazon in the past and her current ratings stand at 4.5. She has published the following books: Expressions on Life Book One, Expressions and Letters, Phraseology and Letters, Collection of 25 Days of Christmas Poetry, and her recently re-release of Poems, Dreams & More. She is currently working on her next book of poetry collections.
Jeniann is a past student at Capella University. She has made both the President's and Dean's list for outstanding academic achievements and she currently holds a 4.0 GPA in her studies. She is hoping to graduate with a Bachelor in Science in Business with a specialized degree in Finance.
Jeniann was born in Whitefish, Montana in 1972. She was raised in Eureka, Montana most of her younger years. She was the youngest of four children and the only surviving girl. Jeniann attended Rexford Elementary school her kindergarten year and the following year she transferred to Eureka Elementary School where she graduated from the eighth grade in 1987. She the attended Lincoln County High School until her junior year when she moved from Eureka to Medford, Oregon with her mother and stepfather.













Poetry Book Blurb and Spotlight:
Poetry is...a book of self-expression through poems about life, love, forbidden love, desires, and nature. This book also includes quotes written by the poet and short articles. Poems featured are: "The Disease," "Clouds of Gray,"  "inkstand," "Mountain Spring," and "Dreams vs. Reality."
The Disease
I was the disease that you never wanted,I played games with your heart,Whenever you looked into my eyes,You couldn't handle the rush of emotions,The feeling of falling,Not knowing if I would be there to pick you up,You played the role of gun and bullet,Out to kill the disease that was aching at your heart,Knowing that the disease is what you wanted,But the pride is the bigger enemy to love,Love would mean letting go,Twirling out of control,The shivers and shakes,The withdrawals,The heart breaking when you weren't with me,Was all but the disease eating at you,And you turned your back,Walked away and killed the diseaseWith the bullet with words of lies,Because I was the disease you wanted all a long.
“inkstand”
as i sit here todaytrying to figure outhow to saythat my mind is about
to call it quits andjust walk away,let the inkstandrust and collapse in dismay
keep these words‘let the inkstand rust and collapse in dismay….”            of words never written
take my chances to ride awaychasing a this crazy dreamit seems as if am about to betraymyself in my own crazy dream
so as i sit here todaytrying to figure outhow to saythat my mind is about
to call it quitsjust walk awaylet the inkstandrust and collapse in dismay
keep these words“let the inkstand  rust and collapse in dismay….”            of words never written
the dreamer in mein which my hands only wrotejust let it bewithin this note
keep these words “let the inkstand rust and collapse in dismay….”            of words never written





Mountain Spring
So beautiful and gentleTinkling downSo ambleMoving forth, as to drown
My wailing cryOf a broken heartPlease do not denyAs we depart
From this earthAnd to reign in heavenThat our love was worthAnd we were chosen
To love not deceitAngel sings ofMusic so sweetAs doves
Symbol our loveSo beautiful and gentleTinkling downSo amble…
Moving forth, as to drownTheir cries, of bells to ringTo hear such soundAt the mountain spring Dreams vs. Reality
I had it all at one time…My moment in lifeWhere I thought everythingWas perfect and nothingCould take that away,
It was only a year agoWhen you were in my lifeSitting around chattingListening to your storiesHearing your laughterSeeing your smile,
But all I have nowIs memories and regrets
If I knew that telling youHow I felt would haveCost me everythingI would have not toldYou, but the feelingsWere so strong,
When we weren’t togetherThe emptinessFelt like a frozen waterfall,Just frozen in timeWith love yearningTo show you
Then when we were togetherThe feelings were so trueAs if God had put you thereTo save me from falling offThat cliff that I was teetering on
Where dreams come trueOr they fell apartInstead of waiting for youI jumped off and told youThat I loved you
And now here I amA year later still waitingAnd only loving youIn my dreams at night.













Clouds of Gray
I awake with clouds of grayHanging over this head of mineSkies are gloomy, sad lookingUpon my face
It feels if there is no wayTo make the sun shineOr to hear the birds singSearching for God’s grace
At the end of the dayHoping God will give me a signJust a small pingIf it is only to embrace
When I bow my head to prayKnowing His love is divineHe will take this achingHeart and replace it
I can sayThat today will be fineAnd the birds will singThe clouds will erase
And the sun will shineUpon my face

Poet Jeniann's Links – Choose which ones to use Do not need to use all! Pre-Order Link until the 22nd of JanuaryAmazon
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Other books by Poet Jeniann BowersExpressions and LettersPhraseology and LettersPoems, Dreams & More

The Sacrificing Mother https://www.amazon.com/dp/1492800449/...

The Circus In Me https://www.amazon.com/dp/148260504X/...

Check out this item in my Etsy shop https://www.etsy.com/listing/20961893...

Hello!
Can anyone tell me what the problem is today in this society we live in?I am sure you can conjure up more than a couple of good hardy excuses. But in my head I have one I keep imagining!We do not take chances on things we do not know.In short, we are scared of change!I am a 3 time self-published author as of last week!My books maybe have sold a couple or so copies.Why is it so hard to convince readers and individuals that your books, or your stories are worth your time? I feel like saying this A LOT!!!!READ MY BOOKREAD IT!!!I KNOW YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT IF YOU WOULD JUST GIVE IT A CHANCE TO BE SOMETHING OTHER THAN A PAPERWEIGHT!!!I understand the heavy grammatical errors that sometimes do reside in these indie written pages.But, with a  little effort and support you could get the word out and maybe we could actually get our work into a mainstream social group. I' don't care about New York Best selling or Prize winning, I really don't because all that says to me, is that you were benefited in a way others were not. So read a book!  fact read my book! PLEASE!!!COMPEL YOURSELF INTO THE UNKNOWN!!!
Summer heat broke records even the state of California tried to deny. Huntington Beach (HB) stood beautiful amongst the ripples of white tips in the blue waves. I catered to the inkling of joining a fling. It was summer, and I wanted to experience as much as immaturity as my mother would let me. On the pier stood absolution of an outstretched arm welcoming an adventurous spirit.There it was. Not something you could see right away like a surfer on the open waves. But it was still there, waiting patiently and quietly inside my adolescent body. This thing would become human and breathe air only months from now. No U-turns ahead to make this reversible, to make this statement of where my body had laid and with whom. The evidence was always against me. Rubee, my alcoholic mother standing by prosecuting me for the dumbfounded predicament I found myself reflecting. Briton and Noah standing before me with question marks. Not necessarily about love, but about who the baby might indeed belong too. I grew up to this point at age 17. I had become like my mother, although not so promiscuous. Her temper of rage and tricks lined the outskirts of our abode. Escape could be a challenge although freedom would finally feel like a good friend welcoming me home. Tough choices to be made, but they were mine alone to make. I found a guilty conscious in the way Noah pleaded to remove the child from inside me. Briton's hushed tones made it clear he would be distant for the time being. I look back to the beginning of the summer and find myself wishing the only thing I ever wanted was to surf and not fall in love. At my age isn't first love or second inevitable? Aren't girls my age dying to be fondled and caressed in a saturated way that brings belief into their hearts that, that is what real love is? I've pretended to fall in love with one out of two gentleman. They both catered back the same equivalent feelings. Hills and valleys will let us know if our succession is relevant or rather a mistake of guidance on our elders part. We are children being led away with a string or a rope, led to another world where our imagination is held captive and our irrelevant lives became purposeful.As we drove past the coastline there was a small sunrise bonfire dying on the shore. All that were left in the dying crackles of the burning flames were the unspoken words of the sacrificing mother. The Sacrificing Mother (43,000 words) is an alluring tale of a young woman’s journey. Through first loves and forceful waves, the struggle to decide to become a mother is definite. Besides surfing and boys, Laney Rhodes takes on a task that requires an amount of strenuous courage to define another one human being.S.M. BJARNSON

https://www.createspace.com/4454273