Greetings and salu—salu—damn, I know this word. Shit. No, that’s not it. That book that is also an animated movie, the one with the pig and the spider—aha! Charlotte’s Web! Yes, that’s it.

No, that’s not the word, just the book and movie title. What was I saying? Oh yes, greetings and salutations. 

Got it. Finally.

That phrase has only been my greeting for a decade as a writer, but damn if I couldn’t remember it. Now that five minutes have passed in my brain and an entire slipstream of...