Queer Romance with an Asexual MC
Romance stories that include an asexual character as one of the MCs or one of the characters in the main romance relationship. This can be m/m, f/f, trans*, bi, gender queer, poly, etc, or hetero-romantic (m/f).
As asexuality is part of LGBTQIA, all the romantic possibilities, including aromantic, are included here under the "queer" umbrella. The main factor for this list is that one or more of the characters in the main romance relationship identify or can be identified on the ace spectrum. Happy reading!
As asexuality is part of LGBTQIA, all the romantic possibilities, including aromantic, are included here under the "queer" umbrella. The main factor for this list is that one or more of the characters in the main romance relationship identify or can be identified on the ace spectrum. Happy reading!
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Heather K (dentist in my spare time)
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May 26, 2016 09:21AM

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I totally agree. Who the heck is asexual in that? Or did I read another book?

I totally agree. Who the heck is asexual in that? Or did I read another b..."
I can't think of a single person!

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't exist in the regency era, but his characterization is consistent with demisexuality.

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't exist in the regen..."
Hmm... never even considered that. That actually makes sense.

Is this the one where the side character was asexual? I think this list is only for asexual MCs, right? I didn't read this one.

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would never even considered that Richard was demisexual. I can totally see it now that i think about it. I wonder how many readers actually picked that one up.

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would never even considered that Richard was demisexu..."
To be honest I had to google the term when I saw it drift past on my feed for this book! Always happy to get a little more schooled though... Just wanted to add the direct evidence of her saying it on the comments of the list because of librarian tidiness. :)

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would ne..."
I actually knew what demisexuality was, but I didn't really think about it with Richard. Now that I do think about it, I really see it!

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't ex..."
After googling the term again ( I do admit I keep forgetting what means what in this world of newish terms for sexual preferences) and thinking about Richard I can see where KJ Charles was heading with this. But although demi-sexual is on the asexual scale is isn't the same. So I guess this book still shouldn't be on this list?

Richard is d..."
I think it is considered part of the asexual umbrella. I'm trying hard to keep up with all the terms too! It's always a learning experience for me, and I keep evolving the more I read. :)

El from Just Love Romance has a great post up today about asexuality, if anyone is interested in reading it. :)
https://justloveromance.wordpress.com...

El from Just Love Romance has a great post up today about asexuality, if anyone is interested in reading it. :)
https://justloveromance.wordpre..."
Just read it and it is certainly worth the read!
I'm a frequent reader of the Aven forums, which is where I get most of my asexuality info. I also recommend people check there to see real people talking about issues or concerns that they are having.
I try to learn a lot about asexuality because, out of the whole QUILTBAG spectrum, asexuality is the one that I struggle with understanding the most.

Is this the one where the side character was asexual? I think this ..."
Yes. Only a side character is asexual.

Is this the one where ..."
I started this list, but am unsure how to remove that book. This list should be for main characters only. (It can be disappointing for readers to come here and read a book, but find ace representation only in side characters. It's like "we're only allowed to be sidekicks" kind of thing. There's a separate list for aces in fiction that can be a better catch-all.


It's an interesting tension that I think the ace community just needs to grapple with and embrace. I was just at an ace discussion group this weekend where there was tension over "why does demi need a category? It's it the most like "normal" relationships?" But that direction can lead to erasing demisexuality, and once again, falling into a trap where we erase one section of a marginalized/underrepresented group. For those on the other side of the ace spectrum, demisexuality can be frustrating because they may have more "passing" privilege. It's something that's not going to go away--we just need to name this tension and maintain a goal of building a welcoming space for *everyone*, and acknowledging that all parts of this spectrum exist, and each have their own layers and things they live with.
If KJ didn't say it though, it would be easy to not see it, and I think that's the blurred line that demis grapple with within our culture. That's why maintaining spaces where they can say, "This is me," is important so they don't get lost in cultural assumptions that they are something else.

Really good poinst, ttg. I really appreciate your input.

That would be great if you could. I don't see an "edit" option for me. (I can only edit the list description) so it looks like I don't have the credentials. Thank you!


No worries. I think the situation related to KJ's book would be similar if someone was an "unnamed" ace, right? Like, they just went through the story and, say they were homo-romantic, and kissed or held hands, but in this specific case, weren't geared towards having sex. For someone looking or aware, they could say, "This character reads ace to me," but for someone not looking or unfamiliar, they could say, "This was a 'sweet' romance. Low heat. I'm imagining hot sexy times for later," and they can move forward with no more thoughts about it. (Then a twitter debates opens up about "Is XX MC ace or not?", etc. Then another debate comes up about whether or not we should label things, and so on.) One thing I know is that we gain so much power from having "named" characters--ones who are labeled whatever the label we're looking for or wishing to see. I know why KJ didn't use the term, so no big deal there, but also know there are probably authors out there who are discouraged from naming identities in their blurbs, and I hope they feel welcome to name it because it's one of the biggest signals to those of us looking desperately for signals.

Thanks! And for Roux fans reading this, sorry! I know it's really AWESOME Roux included an ace side character. This list is just specific for main characters/someone within the main couple. A) For readers looking for ace romance, it's more accurate this way and B) authors writing ace romance with an ace spectrum MC are making a choice to write something that is really underrepresented in queer romance and this list honors that choice and that space. Thank you for understanding!
Two lists that honor ace characters in fiction (MC or side characters) are: Asexuals in Fiction and Ace is the place. Check them out, and if you know of related stories with ace character, please add! :-)

I just started the audio of A Gentleman's Position. I didn't consider Richard demisexual either but it's good to listen to the rest of the book with that knowledge.

I just started..."
I honestly wouldn't have picked up on it, and I'm even aware of demisexuality! I think that has a lot to do with the fact that many people, especially lots of females that I'm friends with, don't feel comfortable or have the desire to engage in sex without having a romantic/emotional connection. Most do not have/feel a need for a name for it. I guess many of them would actually be demisexual, but totally unaware of it.


Yeah, it certainly depends on how they feel, which I'm not really privy to! I just know based on vague things that they tell me.


Thanks for the tip. Maybe someone who is a GR librarian can help with removing one of them. (I don't have the status.)

Thanks for the tip. Maybe someone who is a GR librarian can help with removing one of them. (I don't have the status.)"
Done :)


Cuz I've read a couple on here hoping it wouldnt be all about the ''end-game'' (sex), and they almost always end up having intercourse and I'd rather not read that if possible...
Or just if someone knows a mm romance list (or your shelf) with little to no sex? (or implied or barely talked about, as in a page or less of tasteful-none-awkward sexual things). Cuz the mm genre seems to be way to overwhelmed with sexual fantasies and that's not ever my cup of tea. I can also settle for any other realistic asexual roamnce though, I guess.
Thanks and sorry if that annoys anyone

I think demisexual characters belong on this list because they are on the ace spectrum but I do get where you are coming from because I, too, wish we had more asexual characters to choose from and I'd like my sexual orientation represented more often in the books I read.
Here are some other lists you might want to look at (they are not strictly M/M, though):
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/9...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...
Are you a member of the M/M Romance Group? They have a bookshelf for sexcontent-non-explicit with currently 743 books and a bookshelf for sexcontent-sweet-no-sex with currently 680 books on it. Of course most of them don't feature asexual characters but this might be useful you if you want to avoid on-page sex.
There's also this list I found online where you can sort and filter to find whatever you are interested in. The downside is, that only authors themselves can request their books to be added to it and I don't think most of them know about this list. http://claudiearseneault.com/?page_id...
edit: Personally, I highly recommend Upside Down by N.R. Walker and How to Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune (both authors are ace themselves) if you haven't read them yet.

Oh thanks a lot buddy, I'll go there right now.


Yeah ahah

Yeah ahah"
I found another list
https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/... although I'm pretty sure it's mostly the same books as on the other lists.
And I forgot to mention this series https://www.goodreads.com/series/2510...
I haven't read the books yet and not all of them are published yet but it got good reviews from aces and allos :). As far as I understand, it's a self-portrait of the author himself.