C. JoyBell C.'s Blog, page 44

If you ask the religious person "What do you believe in?" he will tell you about one thing. But if you ask him "What do you not believe in?" he will tell you about many, many things! And if you ask an atheist "What do you believe in?" he will say "Nothing." The only difference between an atheist and a religious person, is one thing. If one thing isn't there, there would be no difference at all! When I say I am losing my religion, I am not saying that I'm losing my belief; but I am saying that I'm losing my disbeliefs.





I have written pieces about atheism time after time (it would be beneficial for you to click on these three links first before proceeding with this reading.) Today I want to talk about the paradox of atheism. I do believe that atheism has come about as a result of religion; this in itself is a paradox, because this means that atheism is the product of religion. Is atheism the ultimate, secret goal of religion? That is a far-out question, and the answer is probably not, but then there is always the small probability that's left to the imagination.




Atheists do not believe in God, because they cannot accept the God that religion presents to all of mankind. They see the inconsistencies, the lies, the violence, and the faults. They disagree with the God of religions, and so they determine by this that there is no God. This is a paradox! Their disbelief has come about as an exact parallel opposite of the religious belief!




I am non-religious, which means I do not believe in religion, but does not mean that I don't believe in God. Why must I cease to believe in God, just because I do not believe in what people have instated about God? If I become an atheist because I cannot believe in what people have instated about God, then that would mean I believe what religion says about God! Which would mean that I believe in religion! Are you following me here? The atheist believes in religion so much, that he/she is actually willing to not believe in any God, at all, because the face of God in religion is just so misconstrued, deformed, manipulated, and twisted! I on the other hand, being non-religious, do believe in God because I don't believe what religious people and religion have to say about God! 




Through studying history, we can see that the human race has always believed in God. We see God in every single culture, ethnical background and practice on the face of this earth! Man is born with a spark of God inside of Him, therefore he seeks to replenish this source: man seeks to find God. That is just the way it has always been. We have evidence of all sorts of spiritual practices from all over this globe! One may argue that there is violence in all forms of spirituality, and I agree with the belief that if there is violence then this is not beneficial to the soul at any level! But then one can also counter argue the fact that violence may creep its way into anything, wherever there is a corrupt soul born into the earth, with which I also agree in the belief that it is the form of soul which created the outer action, not the outer action that molds the soul! On the other hand, there are those forms of spirituality that are truly peaceful and contain no forms of violence, such as Taoism, Buddhism, etc. Notwithstanding, the point of this paragraph is, mankind is born with a connection to God, and seeks to hold the root of that in its hand. And why am I pointing this out? I am pointing this out because I want you to take notice of the fact that atheism is a new movement which has truly come about as a result of organized religion. 




When did Christianity come about? Well, not so long after Christ's death, the Romans came along and took Christ and decided to create a religion around Him– Voilà we have Catholicism and then Protestantism as a result of a rebellion against Catholicism. And there you have it, the major religions of the more modern-day-era have emerged! Islam is a major religion, as well as Judaism, but those are not modern-day religions, those are ancient religions! So if Christianity came about only after Christ's death, then that means Jesus wasn't a Christian? Yes of course that's what it means. Then what was Jesus? Well, we know that Jesus was most definitely not a Pharisee or a Sadducee , because we can see in the Bible that Jesus was the enemy of the Pharisees and the Sadducees. So what was Jesus? The answers to some questions shouldn't be answered by another person, but must be answered by yourself! But we know what he wasn't– he wasn't a practicing Jew of the major forms of Judaism in his day– that of the Pharisee and the Sadducee (which is why the Jews won't accept him as Messiah.) And he wasn't a Christian, because Christianity didn't exist yet! If there's one thing we do know, its that he was a radical! He came along, and told the holiest Rabbis of his day (to their faces) that they were hypocrites and would burn in hell, then sat around eating and drinking with tax collectors and prostitutes. He was the first person in recorded history to create the frame of thought "Let he who has no sin cast the first stone." Huh. Funny that he sounds nothing like the Jesus of the Catholics and the protestants, no?




I am non-religious, because I believe that God is far greater than all religions. I am non-religious because I do not believe what religion has to say and am not impressed by the religious. I am non-religious, because I retain the right to believe in the many truths placed into the never-ending universe by God. I am non-religious because I can see God in everything, not in just one thing. I am non-religious because I have sought and I have found.












Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

The problem with the concept of God– is exactly that– man's concept of Him. There is nothing wrong with God, it is the concept of God that has a problem. We see the reflection of that in various religions. I do not know enough about the God ascribed to by the vaster majority of religions, for me to speak of that, but what I can do is bring to light the concept of the Judeo-Christian God, as well as Allah, the God of the Muslims, and Zeus, the Hellenistic God.



To the Jews, God is primarily the God of the Jews. Every once in a while, you will meet very open-minded religious Jews who believe that all may come to the banqueting table of God, but then even those individuals still have that innermost belief they hold, that the Jews are the righteous race, above all other races. Which brings us to the Christians who also worship the God of the Torah (although New Testament is already now accepted and included); Christians, at least the devout and well-studied ones, secretly wish that they were Jews, because if they were, that would mean that they too are "chosen ones", highly favoured above all others! So this is the flow of thought here, I hope that you are all following easily. Now when we visit the concept of the Muslims, I believe it is more open compared to the Judeo-based beliefs, just because of the fact that Muslims really do want everyone to come and become Muslims, to "see the light", therefore, everyone is welcome! But then there is that twist– in many cases, it is a forced welcome (generally, they actively want people to become Muslims and know Allah), but on the other hand, isn't that not very far from the concept that Christians have (Christians also actively pursue people into becoming Christians). The means varies, but there is a common/shared goal!



I do not have an extreme amount of head knowledge regarding Hellenistic religion, but of what I do know, I am impressed in the sense that the Greeks may have acknowledged that their gods were the gods of all mankind and not just the Greeks, which is something unique and not often the case as we can see from what we've already discussed above. I do believe that to some extent, their gods were primarily Greek (they do live on Oros Olympos, or in modern-day times, have originated from there as souls), but there seems to be a slightly significant acknowledgment of the existence of other races and peoples. For one example, we can see in the Bible (the Christian sacred text) that it was the Greeks who came from afar to listen to Jesus' teachings! So obviously, they were aware of a world reaching further than their own borders, and were humble enough to seek wisdom from someone of a different race, actually traveling to that country in order to find him! Definitely in those times, the Greeks were worshipping their gods of Mt. Olympus, nevertheless, they saw with their own eyes that truth expanded beyond that, and possessed humble and willing hearts. Moreover, I know not of any stories about Greeks invading other lands, mass murdering civilians while demanding that the inhabitants worship Zeus (unlike the Catholics, Protestants and the Muslims).



The concept of God, is greatly flawed, in the perception that God is inherently more active in a single race of people, or within a single church or group of people. When is God the God of everyone that He created? Because that makes sense to me, really. If God were only the God of the Jews, then why did He create every other race on the planet? If God were only the God of the Muslims, then why did He create Jews? If God were only the God of the Christians, then why would he make the Greeks and the Celts and the Africans? If there is supposed to be only one kind of us, then why are there so many kinds of us? You know, it is a simple question, unfortunately it is one which is not often seen! And when you don't see a question, you don't ask it! When you can't ask a question, you don't find the answer to it! There are many kinds of us, because there are supposed to be many kinds of us. There are many religions, because people need to relate to God on a personal level, and it's difficult to relate to God on a personal level, when you are also thinking that He belongs just as much to everybody else who is different from you, as He belongs to you!



I believe that there is a truth which can be found, in many different places! There are answers that can be found, in diverse places! The Greeks have a truth, the Jews have a truth, the Muslims have a truth, the Celts had a truth (in some places, still have a truth), the Christians have a truth, the Buddhists have a truth... Everyone picked up a different part of the truth, and while observing it's beauty in the palm of their hand, was convinced that there could be no other like it, out there! The fact is, each piece was a piece broken off from the great big, beautiful mother-of-pearl shell that shattered and fell to the earth! I think I read something about that, somewhere, a long time ago. I'm not so sure and can't remember where or how, but the faint memory of discovering and realizing that, is in my mind.



So why would God not give the entire truth to a single group of people? Oh, probably because if He did, we wouldn't reach out anymore! We would cease to exist, because we would already have the entire answer! The reason why we exist and grow and multiply and continue on, is because we are still searching, we are still learning, we are still becoming better! Becoming better is an eternal process! You could spend a thousand years becoming better, and there would still be even more better to become (and that is a beautiful thought.) If God gave the whole shell to one nation/ one people, then why would everybody else be there, anyway? As onlookers? As collateral damage? Decorations? Just like we have different colors of skin, different colors of hair and eyes– we have different truths buried within us! The perfection comes when we all raise up our own piece of the shell into the sky, to be united with everyone else's, and we see, that it all comes together in a gigantic pattern! It's not that your piece of the shell is right or wrong, its just that it's not the whole shell. There's more, and we can put it all together! And the only way that we can put it all together, is by raising our hands as one!







Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

As some of you may already know, I am an amateur astronomer. My books tell me that the universe is so vast, the human mind cannot even come to terms with it. In our galaxy alone, there are billions of earth-like planets, billions of suns (I'm talking in terms of hundreds of billions here), and billions of solar systems. The fabric of the universe is intensely dense but at the same time considered as barren space (everything is in nothing but then nothing is in everything). When one thinks about the Milky Way Galaxy, one cannot even fathom that vastness – his own vastness (of his own galaxy) but then the truth is that, there are trillions of galaxies in the universe! The planet earth resides in only one of these galaxies! The universe is eternity– it is continually expanding and what is it expanding from? It is already expanding from eternity! The limitless grows to become even more limitless! Therefore, based upon these facts, these truths, I am astounded at the thought that anyone on this earth could even begin to think that there is no other form of intelligent life in outer space. In fact, how the hell could there not be any other form of life elsewhere? Why are people comfortable with what they can explain and immediately feel insecure when approached with something for which they have no explanation? This is a form of arrogance mixed with cowardice. And why is it that if something doesn't fit into our scientific mold (which is more like a minute, tiny, little thimble in the universe), we laugh and consider it to be hogwash? Why, we've only had how many thousands of years of civilization to come up with scientific theories and thoughts? And we think we can fit eternity into these finite ideologies? Come on now. Let go of arrogance, and open yourself up to the world, and then beyond!





Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

As some of you may already know, I am an amateur astronomer. My books tell me that the universe is so vast, the human mind cannot even come to terms with it. In our galaxy alone, there are billions of earth-like planets, billions of suns (I'm talking in terms of hundreds of billions here), and billions of solar systems. The fabric of the universe is intensely dense but at the same time considered as barren space (everything is in nothing but then nothing is in everything). When one thinks about the Milky Way Galaxy, one cannot even fathom that vastness – his own vastness (of his own galaxy) but then the truth is that, there are trillions of galaxies in the universe! The planet earth resides in only one of these galaxies! The universe is eternity– it is continually expanding and what is it expanding from? It is already expanding from eternity! The limitless grows to become even more limitless! Therefore, based upon these facts, these truths, I am astounded at the thought that anyone on this earth could even begin to think that there is no other form of intelligent life in outer space. In fact, how the hell could there not be any other form of life elsewhere? Why are people comfortable with what they can explain and immediately feel insecure when approached with something for which they have no explanation? This is a form of arrogance mixed with cowardice. And why is it that if something doesn't fit into our scientific mold (which is more like a minute, tiny, little thimble in the universe), we laugh and consider it to be hogwash? Why, we've only had how many thousands of years of civilization to come up with scientific theories and thoughts? And we think we can fit eternity into these finite ideologies? Come on now. Let go of arrogance, and open yourself up to the world, and then beyond!



xx

I thought I'd elaborate on my closing thoughts in the post I made below (bad mothers). "So how are we to see our children?"



As we have already discussed, it is the selfish view of one's children as "self-embellishments" onto one's own self and life, that is repugnant. It is repugnant, but it is all too common. I won't reiterate every point I've already surfaced, because you can read the earlier post, yourself. I want to expound on the beautiful nature of the relationship between mother and child, without repeating what I've already said.



I personally don't shout out from the tops of the roofs that I'm a mother. As you can see, I don't have the classic "mother, writer, sister, blogger" at the top of this blog, and not even often in my author descriptions. I have no opinions about those who do use the word mother as an adjective in describing themselves, for all I know, they are simply proud and happy to be mothers! I can only look inward into my own consciousness and know my own self. I know that I feel strongly against using the word "mother" often, as an adjective to describe myself. I write about being a mother with much fondness and affection, but at the same time I don't milk that cow. I feel (personally) that I am uncomfortable with the idea of doing that. Yes, when my son came along, he made me a mother, but then I don't see that as a hat that I wear, I rather see that as a deep description of my relationship with my son at a seed level.



What if you were a spring of water bursting forth from the earth and a bird of paradise came to drink from you? Is the bird of paradise a form of embellishment for the spring of water? In my eyes, it is not. The wellspring of fresh, pure water is a source of life and a sustenance of life, for the bird of paradise. Once the bird comes along, you become a source for that bird! You have become the giver, not the taker, but in that very same instant there is a beautiful relationship that happens! The essence of you is brought forth by the bird seeing you as a source of life and sustenance! The essence of the wellspring of water is brought forth by the bird who drinks of your life-giving nature! So you have given, but in your giving your beautiful essence is brought forth; not through self-embellishment and sticking the bird into yourself to decorate you; but the very material of your essence is brought forth by the divine act of giving from the very nature of what you are made of. This is the area, the plane, where the relationship of mother and child must thrive! This is the living, existing Eden for mother and her child, the sacred beauty of the relationship. Anything else has fallen short.



If you seek to replenish your insecurities, your lack, your losses, your bitterness, resentment, and spite, through the means of your children, you will never enter into this Eden, unless you fully see what I am trying to show you. There is no selfishness that exists in the spring's relationship with the bird, yet in giving of herself, the spring has been able to receive replenishment and confirmation of the very fabric of her essence, from the bird. This is the relationship in it's most perfect form.



In the heart of God, lies the heart of both a mother and a father. It is the very material of the nature of God to give, and the pleasure lies not in what we can do for God, but the pleasure of God lies in how we are there to replenish and confirm the very fabric of His essence.






Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

Why are bad mothers among those who have the highest expectations and opinions of their children? This is the question I want to examine, today.



First, we need to identify what case of "bad mother" we are looking at here; I want to look at the mother who sees their children as an accessory to their lives: insurance policies in a marriage, a means to step into a higher class of society, a new way to live down past childhood insecurities– all in all, when one sees their children as self-embellishments. That's the kind of bad mother we're going to discuss today. Of course I know there are much worse out there, but then anything worse than what I'm proposing, I consider to be a product of Hades (seriously, because Hades has his own posterity too), so let's not go there. Without giving any thought on judging the reasons people get married (I personally believe that's 100% none of my business), let's look at the active, apparent choices that bad mothering exudes.



So, back to the question: Why is it that a bad mother is most likely to be of the persuasion that her child/children must shine the brightest? I'm not saying that all mothers who want their children to shine the brightest are bad mothers; I'm talking about the moms who compare their own kids to other happier, more intelligent, well-rounded children whilst the green-eyed monster takes ahold of them! For some reason, they cannot accept that in this big world there exists those who are better (especially because they are terrible mothers, of course other kids are going to turn out better!) In their unrelenting pursuit to fill the many voids within themselves, they fail to connect with their children/child at a seed level. They fail to become that pillar of wisdom, the gentle touch of the potter's hand! They forget to see their child.



I think I understand this phenomena. We must not have a hate, but an understanding. A woman who sees her children as a means of self-embellishment, in any way, is mainly just thinking about herself. Her insecurities. How she didn't shine when she was little. How the kids back then were mean to her. One day when she has kids with a rich man, she's going to make sure that they don't live the life that she lived! There's a tremendous amount of unaddressed insecurity there. Bitterness and spite. Every time another kid in the class is happier, shines brighter, this mama once again feels the sting of her yesteryears. Her focus is all on herself, really. Instead of seeing her children/child as their own people with their own lives who are her biggest blessings to have and to hold and to teach and to mold; she sees her offspring as a second chance at her own life! The life she once only dreamt of. And so the child becomes an object. Yes, the object is living, breathing, laughs and cries– but it is an object nonetheless. It is not a bearer of a unique destiny, the bearer of an individual soul!



So how are we to see our children? Well, I believe that children have souls, those souls could be older and wiser than our own, we never know right away! There are many old fools that have grown old as baby souls while there are some children who were born emperors and empresses! A child isn't about you. I'm sorry, but once you become a mother, you are about your child! It's time to create sacrifices in the form of letting go of your insecurities, bitterness, spite, unforgiveness– for the very sake of your child/children! Maybe you never did make amends; but now's the time to forget all of that!  If you are to throw away that gift from your mind and your heart, and would rather see yourself as a prism of light with attachments that happen to have come from your womb– well, it's time for some metanoia! It's time for some true change. (Click here to continue this thought...)







Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

Roots



Your judgement of others could be the single greatest obstruction in the path of your destiny.



The minute she was born into this world

Her soul was rooted into her path of destiny

Looking unto the rainbow that cast itself

Ever so gracefully over her horizon

She looked into her destiny with eyes

Free of defilement and hurt

The path was straight, the rainbow was

Painted vibrantly onto the air

There was no way she would get lost

She stood at the beginning of her destiny

Her soul peered through her path

Her eyes fixated onto her destination

It was grand and good, molded by God’s hands



The minute she stepped into church

She was taught to see sin

This was the sin of others

That was the sin of those people

These were the sins of her neighbors

Herself, her family, her friends...

The preacher taught her repentance

The priest taught her to identify insufficiency

On her path where she stood, her gaze

Began to falter as she turned to face the left

And the right: seeking for the sins in others

She began to point, she began to scorn

She began to take offense in actions that did her no wrong



The minute she lost focus of her beautiful rainbow

Her horizon was out of sight

She strayed to the left, she strayed to the right

In pursuit of all that was wrong with the world

All that was wrong with all the people in it

Her vision was no longer set on what was her own

But was set on the shortcomings that were not her own

With these judgments, she filled the void that was inside her soul

The great ravine dug by the hands of her many judgments

The many catechisms tempted her astray

They say sin is temptation

But no greater a temptation is there that exists

Than one’s own attraction to self-righteousness



The hands of judgments covered her eyes

The songs of insecurities sang her intoxicated

She drank on wines of wrath and spite

It was her own pursuit of holiness that

Turned her into a whore; a squanderer of ignorance

She desecrated her own mind

With her judgments of others

The shit in her mind fouled not the people

But only trashed her own spirit!

Until she found herself standing

In the very shoes she once despised

All too soon, she found herself standing

In the very shoes she once reviled



Looking into a mirror, she saw the very person

That she had once looked down upon

Looking into a mirror, she saw the very soul

That she had once counted as a candidate for hell

“Oh God, forgive me!” She felt shame, shame, shame

And remembered the first day of her birth

The way she once saw her destiny, her journey, her destination:

With untainted eyes, open and fixated!

With untainted eyes, transparent and free!

She remembered how it once was

How it should have always been

And saw how far away from that path she’d strayed

Her roots so far away



“I am nothing but a whore of holiness”

“Oh God, release me from my bonds!”

Step after painstaking step

Sojourning on the path of true light

The weight of the past years crumbled and fell

While she journeyed closer and closer to the light

The veil over her eyes cracked like desert earth

It dissolved like useless dust

Each step taking her home, bringing her home

Until she finally stood back at her point of birth

Where all the memories returned

She saw through newborn eyes, once again

The rainbow in the horizon





Copyright © 2012 C. JoyBell C. All rights reserved.

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Fonts are just powerful. Typeface, I have to say, is one of the most powerful little things in the world, in this day and age! I know for a fact, through observation and keen empathy, that one can change the nature of the feeling that is expressed by a writing, just by changing the font that the piece is written in! I have tested this in fact; by changing each stanza of one of my poems, into a different typeface and though the entire poem is a collective idea, each stanza immediately began to tell its own story in a unique voice! I immediately began to see a different type of person speaking the lines to my face! One was leaning on a window with a cigarette; chic and worldly wise! The other whispered skillfully, another spoke with eyes transparent and open, eyes that conveyed wholeheartedness and sincerity! Another undermined itself, like a woman possessing understated elegance!



Today, I have created a positive change for myself, by changing the type of fonts used in my POP mail accounts on my desktop! I chose Alex Antiqua Book for the headers, and Centaur for the main messages. The feel was immediately free-flowing and serene, as if I could read an entire serious message and just breathe a sweet smile at the end of it all, as if the Centaur font had just given me the power to take over the world!



How does one tune in to the influence of the typeface? I believe it requires very honed and keen empathy– the ability to recognize the emotions as they form and unfold in the air, in relation to even the tiniest things that have triggered them!



Interestingly, Alex Antiqua Book transpires beautifully as a typeface for headings, but not for main text! Centaur is serene as a main text while Perpetua is solid and dependable. Aaaahhhh... we could all change the world! By choosing our fonts more carefully! And by caring about our fonts more often!

"I’d rather be first in a little Iberian village, than second in Rome." (Julius Caesar)

– Motto of Gangsters.









"I am not an Athenian or a Greek, but a citizen of the world." (Socrates)

– Motto of demi-gods.